I Am a Mamet Wanna Be
I wrote this scene. It is an embellishment of actual events.......not sure what I will do with it.
Lobby of Hotel Mondrian, Los Angeles.
Man and two hotel guests, two guards, others in lobby are loitering.
Dec 31, 1999.
Guard 1: You are going to have to leave the hotel now, guests with room keys ONLY.
Man: This is such bullshit, just because it is New Year’s?
Guard 1: Sir, this is always our policy. We have the right to enforce who enters the hotel. Now, you and your friends must leave.
Man: Oh, man. I can’t believe this SHIT! You guys are such fucking monkies.
(Guard 2 lunges at Man, hits in face. Man recovers coolly while Guard 1 keeps the two at a distance. Man is shaken, but not hurt or injured. Guest 1 comes over to help Man, Lobby extras stop talking and look, some murmur and whisper)
Man: You stupid prick. You stupid, fucking prick. Do you know what you just did? (Short Pause) Asshole? (Long Pause) You just broke a contract…(Guard 2 looking confused, slightly moves lips as if he is going to say something) Hold on a second…you just broke a time honored contract. (Medium Pause) A man is in a certain locale, away from his home. A man is in a place. He is in need of a bed and a nice meal for the night. He goes to another man and says, “Sir, I would like to have a room in you establishment.” The other man obliges and money is exchanged for the service rendered. Do you get it? Do you see what I am saying? Dumbfuck? You are a member of the service industry. SERVICE. Your job is to help this hotel serve its customers. Not to attack them. Of course, you have your documents with your fucking small print and clauses to say you have a RIGHT. But you forgot about the unwritten contract. That of men, and not fairies. That, assuming no one is loud and unruly, that all are welcome in the hotel. You forgot, and now you’re fucked. I tell you what else; I am going to press charges. Oh yes. Not because I am hurt. No. Because I want to make sure you don’t ever do this to your wife or your kids or your fifty-dollar whores and ruin their lives; if you haven’t already, you fucking fat-ass. Soon you’re gonna spend your nights on hard beds and your days with your new bank robber boyfriends. Now, … get the fuck out of my face. (Leaves with other Guests. Guards calmly argue. Lobby extras are silent)
Lobby of Hotel Mondrian, Los Angeles.
Man and two hotel guests, two guards, others in lobby are loitering.
Dec 31, 1999.
Guard 1: You are going to have to leave the hotel now, guests with room keys ONLY.
Man: This is such bullshit, just because it is New Year’s?
Guard 1: Sir, this is always our policy. We have the right to enforce who enters the hotel. Now, you and your friends must leave.
Man: Oh, man. I can’t believe this SHIT! You guys are such fucking monkies.
(Guard 2 lunges at Man, hits in face. Man recovers coolly while Guard 1 keeps the two at a distance. Man is shaken, but not hurt or injured. Guest 1 comes over to help Man, Lobby extras stop talking and look, some murmur and whisper)
Man: You stupid prick. You stupid, fucking prick. Do you know what you just did? (Short Pause) Asshole? (Long Pause) You just broke a contract…(Guard 2 looking confused, slightly moves lips as if he is going to say something) Hold on a second…you just broke a time honored contract. (Medium Pause) A man is in a certain locale, away from his home. A man is in a place. He is in need of a bed and a nice meal for the night. He goes to another man and says, “Sir, I would like to have a room in you establishment.” The other man obliges and money is exchanged for the service rendered. Do you get it? Do you see what I am saying? Dumbfuck? You are a member of the service industry. SERVICE. Your job is to help this hotel serve its customers. Not to attack them. Of course, you have your documents with your fucking small print and clauses to say you have a RIGHT. But you forgot about the unwritten contract. That of men, and not fairies. That, assuming no one is loud and unruly, that all are welcome in the hotel. You forgot, and now you’re fucked. I tell you what else; I am going to press charges. Oh yes. Not because I am hurt. No. Because I want to make sure you don’t ever do this to your wife or your kids or your fifty-dollar whores and ruin their lives; if you haven’t already, you fucking fat-ass. Soon you’re gonna spend your nights on hard beds and your days with your new bank robber boyfriends. Now, … get the fuck out of my face. (Leaves with other Guests. Guards calmly argue. Lobby extras are silent)
posted by ap2 at 6:28 PM
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